"Gosh, I don't know. So much has happened but nothing's changed at all."
I did, in one plane of existence or another, venture back in time to the 1920's. It was there that I encountered the great grandfather of a well known actor, Jake Gyllenhaal (sp?). I've always been a fan of his teeth and find him sexually attractive since his early work of Donny Darko. So it would only be appropriate to run into his great grandfather during a brief stint of time travel.
With my fantastic finger waves and my blue flapper dress, I determined that since I've accomplished time travel, I should use this opportunity to have some sort of physical contact with Jake Gyllenhaal great grandfather. It would be a challenge because he's off eyeing up this beatiful blond female that has glowing eyes.
I spend my the evening trying to catch his attention but come to realize I'm not the hot number I used to be. Which is why I have to trap him in a room. I don't know how we both ended up in the room but I did something to the door to make it stick shut. And then I turned on my charm.
Soon enough we got to making out. I realized that Jake Gyllenhaal's great grandfather is not the worlds greatest kisser. I credit the evolution of kissing as the cause of my disappointment. I think about that man of mine that's asleep next to my body in the world of consciousness. He's a much better kisser than Jake's great grandfather. I ponder if I should feel guilty about this but I figure boyfriend would be ok with the sheer randomness of my time travel.
During the making out, Jake Gyllenhaal's grandfather morphed from looking like Jake to looking like John Travolta with a 5:00 shadow. It was terribly unpleasant and I decided to get the fuck out of there.
Upon my return to the conscious world, I told boyfriend about my experience. He was happy to know that he's a better kisser than Jake Gyllenhaal's great grandfather and glad I made it home safe.
According to Wikipedia...
Leonard Gyllenhaal was a leading Swedenborgian who supported the printing and spreading of Swedenborg's writings. His grandson, the Swedish-American journalist Anders Leonard Gyllenhaal, retained the faith of his grandfather and was a member of the Swedenborgian New Church. His descendants in the American branch of the family include the actor siblings Jake and Maggie Gyllenhaal.
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